Where's your water wings, biotch?!?

I wonder, is it possible to be standing at a crossroads without knowing what the roads are? Here I stand, err...sit...with several decisions before me. All of them very different, and having nothing to do with each other, yet somehow mysteriously linked.

Can't wait to see where this life of mine takes me. Anywhere but here, I'm ready to move forward now. Frustrated without frustration. Not that this comment makes any bit of sense in the slightest.

Basically, I have no idea where I'm standing, and no idea where I'm going...but ready to go. I don't even know what this means, I just know that this is.

Sometimes it's so hard to express myself, who I am, what I think, what I feel. Yeah...especially that last one. I think I have the hardest time expressing what I feel. Feelings somehow have a way of eluding my grasp in words.

Blast those fickle emotions.

This crazy little thing called life sure is an interesting experience. Onward, forward, forever moving on. Some of those moments you just want to pause and hold on to forever, others you just want to fast forward through and skip to the next. The harsh reality is that we can't do either.

All we can do is live. All we can do is exist. Just float. I may need to invest in some water wings. Now if only I could figure out what the equivalent of those are in life! haha

Until next time, don't forget to breath.

Runnin on empty

Running, running, running...out of steam? At the rate I'm going here (in overdrive), I'm bound to burn out soon. But the real question is how long will I be able to keep this up for, a real good question indeed. At least when I'm so blasted busy, I don't have time to be depressed, right? I certainly don't have time to dwell or focus on my life's problems. Doesn't make them go away, but at least I'm too distracted to notice much. 3 jobs...I got this. However, I want to take a couple of days off before this summer is over. There are a couple of things, that I absolutely want to do this season. #1 spend a day at the zoo. I absolutely want to do this asap! I need to take a day off, and find somebody willing to go and do this with me. #2 spend a day at Lagoon. I haven't been in a while, and I feel like I'm ready for another Lagoon day. But when? When am I going to squeeze this in? And who am I going to go with? Hmmm....oh well. I'll figure it out soon, I hope.

I am exhausted, and full of energy at the same time. I'm not sure exactly how that works. But hey, if anybody can pull off the walking contradiction thing, it's me. Can has nap? Oh wait, no I can't. I have another job to go to after this one today. Then girl's night after that. Running, running, running...out of steam. Yup, that's me. Living life on the run for a while here. Maybe I'll develop mad 007 driving skillz. That'd be pretty nifty. Vroom vroom. That's one way to save time, eh? haha

So here I sit at work, probably shouldn't be blogging, but blogging I am. No deep, life revelation thoughts. Just...nothing? I don't know how to describe that feeling of nothing on my mind. It's almost a restless feeling, because it's not fully a nothing kind of nothing. It's more like a "I can't figure out what it is" kind of nothing. There's something there, I'm just not quite sure what. I hate that. Maybe this black dye seeped through my scalp, and into my skull, contaminating my brain? That's it! It's because my hair is black now. Next my thoughts. Then my soul. Dun dun dun...blackest black, blacker than the night...or something like that. Or you know, maybe not. Maybe it's nothing like that at all. **shrug**

Pandora radio take me away. I've only got 2 1/2 hrs left...then off to the next one. That's not bad. I can do this. And the new system at work seems to be up and working. Bugs are hopefully all worked out now. Here's to a smooth rest of the shift. Until next time, don't forget to breath.